94 Comments
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The Sophist's avatar

Oh God Annie, the gloves.

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Paola Bassanese's avatar

Yes! Thoughtful AND sensual at the same time!

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Rebecca Ladbrook's avatar

I loved the gloves comment too!

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Vicki Sunderland's avatar

Marriage is waking up and choosing each other every single day…

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Laura's avatar

Beautiful and true. But oh god. The clearing of the throat. If anything results in my husband being buried under our patio it’ll be the clearing of the throat.

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Vanessa Tout's avatar

I too could be guilty of this crime in the future 😵‍💫

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Polly's avatar

Forty year marriage & you just described our marriage. Yes I would add a few other things. Now in the youth of our senior years, it is even more heavy, this concept of loving / accepting who they are becoming, how they are changing. Thank you for this essay, is it poetry? My husband is 64, I am 62. We see our bodies changing. We fight the decline with our intentions. While our spirits become closer than ever.

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Hayley's avatar

Love this ❤️ I’m glad I’m not the only one that can never bring myself to say ‘my husband’ .. we’ve been together 22 years and married for 13 😂

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Saved by Grace's avatar

Love this...we've been married for 39 years this year and together for 40. I wrote about marriage last week because we were reflecting on how it felt to be 67 and 73, not 27 and 33!

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Treeza Sodah's avatar

Wear me on you! Divine. This is a beautiful raw read. 🥰

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Megan's avatar

I’m getting married soon. This is exactly what I needed to read!

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Leanne White's avatar

Good god yes. The noises !! 29 years later and I’m pleased I now know the noises are heard by others too…. And then not heard at all 🤔

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Katie McCrory's avatar

I’ve gotta stop reading things that make me cry in public ❤️ Thank you for this beautiful composition of what makes a marriage, Annie.

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Recovering People Pleaser's avatar

Together 26 years, married 22. Celebrated the start of all the things in February and the actual legal marriage in March. (We celebrate both because he says the first one was when the marriage truly started.) Just this week I told him he annoyed me more than any other human being on the planet (and I live in Trump 2.0 America, so that’s really saying something), but also that he is the only human who makes me truly and unequivocally happy. And so I choose him (and our 3 almost adult kids, 2 dogs, cat, rose bushes, all the things) every single day. Especially when he is annoying me.

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Tinuke's avatar

This is maybe the most beautiful and factual way I’ve heard someone describe marriage. Thank you for putting these thoughts to paper

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Annie Macmanus's avatar

thanks so much Tinuke

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Duane Marshall's avatar

♥️ a beautiful read. 😍

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Yvonne Grace's avatar

Yep to all that, I get it. Nice to be reminded.

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Anna Carey's avatar

Love this and also the privilege of being able to sneak off to sleep in the spare room when my husband’s snoring kicks in (we’ve been together since 2001, when we were 25, but the snoring has only started in recent years) has saved my marriage.

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Nathan's avatar

This is beautiful and real and worth fighting for

(grateful to have found the same).

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